When we talk of 'taming the tongue' many people automatically assume that it means to watch your language. Don't curse. Don't say bad words. After that, we conclude that it refers to gossip. All of those things are correct, but there is another aspect of taming our tongues that often goes unnoticed. Complaining and arguing.
Turn your Bibles to Philippians 2:14. Read it. Read it again. "Do everything without complaining or arguing."
The key word I want you to focus on is "everything." Everything. All. Without exception. Each and every thing. Now notice the word "do." For you non-English majors out there, do is a verb. Do is an action word. As Christians, we are called to serve. What type of servant are you? Are you the one that mumbles and groans and nitpicks?
People say that they just to need to let it all out, or that it helps them get through the task. Well, folks, that's not what the Bible is teaching us. Complaints and arguments have no place in the body of Christ. Our mothers taught us that if we had nothing nice to say then we didn't say anything at all! Complaints and arguing are not "nice." In fact, if you "have" to get it out, then perhaps you need to take a closer look at the condition of your heart.
Turn to Matthew 15:1-20. The Pharisees question the disciples of Jesus when they do not wash their hands and Jesus takes this opportunity to explain the true cause of uncleanliness. If you find yourself muttering under your breath then you need to repent and purify your heart. You are unclean.
What should come out of your mouth, then? Turn to Ephesians 4:29. "Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen." Complaints do not edify anyone, nor do they bring lost souls to Christ. Complaints and arguments are just as "unwholesome" as foul language and gossip.
Look at 2 Timothy 2:23. "Don’t have anything to do with foolish and stupid arguments, because you know they produce quarrels." The Bible says it like it is - arguments are stupid. Stupid. What do they do? They produce quarrels. People continue to believe that if they "argue" then they will convince or change someone else's opinions. If you are on Facebook, then you know full well that no one's mind has ever been changed by starting an argument. What happens when someone posts an argument? Everyone starts quarreling and someone eventually resorts to name calling and maybe even a 'caps lock' just to show how loud they are really yelling. Read Romans 16:17-18. Arguments not only lead to quarrels but they also lead to division. Division is detrimental to our mission as Christians.
Now imagine how you look to non-believers. Did you bring them to Christ? Did you show them Jesus? Not by a long shot. In fact, you have driven them away. Repent. Memorize Philippians 2:14 and recite it every time you start to complain or argue.
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